I am so tired of waiting. I feel like I'm in some kind of holding pattern. Just waiting for the next part of my life to start. I know that having another baby is going to make things so much more difficult and complicated. I know I am going to be so incredibly tired.
But I will not be pregnant.
I'm tired of feeling so heavy. I'm tired of aching, of being so large and cumbersome. I am sick of being a subject of commentary for every single person I see. I don't blame people, but at the same time I am so sick of saying 'Yep. Still pregnant.'
I have another appointment on Tuesday, and they will do a stretch and sweep (ick) if the baby still hasn't arrived. But I really don't want to be induced. Georgie was induced and I don't want to do that again. I know it will be much better for all of us if I can just sit this out and wait for the baby to come in it's own time. I don't want to be induced unless there is a valid medical reason for it. But Oh! I am so ready for this baby to come. I just need to patient a little while longer.
I want to meet this new little person. To find out if it is a girl or a boy. To see who this is. I want the labour over and done with so I can stop fretting about things going badly. There are so many questions I have, that can only be answered after this baby arrives.
I know that I just need to cope. Get on with this. In the grand scheme of things it is nothing. There are so many people facing so many terrible and horrific things and here I am whining about being pregnant (seriously?). This baby will come in it's own perfect time.
But I am more than ready to get out of this limbo. I am ready for the next chapter.
Linking up with Kellie at The Good, the Bad & The Unnecessary who is the new host of Things I know.